What is fear? It is a physical or emotional response to danger. Different types of fears lead to different responses.
You have routine life fears. The fuzzy eight-legged critter named Charlotte who calls your living room corner home. The six-month check-up for your pearly whites that includes scrapping, gum bleeds and the tooth doctor reminding you to floss every day. The airplane that is the only mode of transportation to that remote island on your bucket list. The wood podium and microphone that awaits you to share your knowledge with the audience.
Routine life fears are manageable and usually don’t keep us from achieving our full potential. The biggest fears, those which can interfere with our success, are failure and rejection. These fears find a cozy place in our mind where they often hide without us knowing of their occupancy. They live in room 13 in our blindspot hotel.
When a sudden change in your world causes your fears to come out of room 13, you likely react through paralyzing yourself or retaliating in a passive or active way. You paralyze yourself when you quit, avoid, run and hide and focus on what you cannot do rather than what you can do. You retaliate when you stop communicating, hide information, exclude rather than include, roadblock others and cause drama. Either response can lead to a dysfunctional environment and kills relationships.
Think about your fears that hide in room 13, fears that you have already experienced. Define the fears. Embrace the fears through self-awareness. Stare the fears in the face when they exit room 13 and stop them before they stop you. Love the fears for helping you learn and grow through life’s experiences.
When you let fear help you rather than hurt you, you will save yourself, achieve the things you want to achieve and build long-lasting relationships.